I think I made the promise about a year ago that I wouldn’t get too political or express any “real” views and for the most part I’ve stuck to that. No one really wants my ignorant take on the world at large. Besides, I’m saving that all up for my government think tank application and I can’t have you all stealing my ideas.

Let me back up a bit as to why I read CNN online. I read it for the tabloid headlines. I skim through the real stuff and aim for anything that sounds sensational. There are two categories I shoot for “cruel things that people do to each other” (as the child of a Social Worker who once worked in Child Protective Services, I can still find things that absolutely stun me – plus, after a few of those articles I can reconfirm that all the Julies in my neighborhood really are serial killers – they’re probably lurking in my closet as I type) and “things that will really make me mad”.

Well, today was pretty low on “cruel things” so I headed straight for “New Chinese Adoption Rules: Must Have an Appealing Face” or something like that. I clicked on the link to watch a little video about how poor fat unmarried Americans with facial “deformities” need not look China’s way when it comes to adoption.

I’m no authority on the situation in China, but I have read a bit about adoptions (unfortunately, one of my books that I could flip through for statistics is on loan so I can’t slam them out). I’ve read about the infant mortality rate – how in some rural areas a bowl filled with ash is kept near the bedside of a woman in labor in case the newborn is a not the desirable gender; it’s a convenient way to smother her. I’ve read about the lost girls – an estimated million plus women who are undocumented and living in China – the conditions in the orphanages and the lost women who roam marketplaces howling where they’ve left their children to be found, since abandoning a child is illegal. Basically, you have a disposable set of people. So, given that, I could see where you wouldn’t want someone whose BMI is in the 30’s. A family whose income is in the $70’s would be a lousy choice, because given the option who wouldn’t rather be brought up in cramped and filthy conditions? In fact, come to think of it, I may put myself up for adoption in China. Harelip? Strabismus? Overbite? Underbite? Sloped brow? What on earth makes you think you could provide a child love? Thank God China is here to let me know that I’d be unfit. My weight, my eyes, my salary and my facial scar that I’ve had since I was 5 (falling face first into concrete shaped my child rearing destiny) not only tell me, but they tell the rest of the world, I’m incapable of loving or raising children. Maybe we can finally get back to feeling the shape of skulls to determine psychological disorders.

Hmm… I wonder what overly simplistic formula we could devise that could tell us what types of people were capable of violating human rights, mismanaging governments and still retaining Most Favored Nation status? (I had to throw the last bit in or some of you would have gotten off target. Yes, and I know about NTR, but you get my drift.)